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Why is it so hard to date nowadays?

09.06.2025 02:42

Why is it so hard to date nowadays?

These reasons I’m giving are not excuses, they are also not “one at a time.” These are all factors that come into play all at the same time, which is why I personally find it hard to date.

The prideful personas.

I think 3 million Americans have this problem too, which is why I partly believe that dating is low right now. A lot of it are health issues. These untested vaccines (which i did not take but others did) and this dang disease.

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NUMBER 1: Health problems since Covid

Right now, I’m waiting for it to pass. Supposedly there is a 2 year mark. I reached that mark in February. I feel better than I did prior, but I still have issues. Until this fatigue and chest stuff goes away, I’m out of the game.

Covid destroyed my health

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I’m around women who aren’t my type most the time

Everything is expensive now! It’s weird!

I gotta be too careful with what I say, but being a realist is my personality

Why did my crush like me for only two days in a row?

Drinking and parties.

Drugs.

NUMBER 3: Social Divide

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

Again, this is not a big problem for me, but it is a little annoying. Even women at work who are into me had this tension against me sometimes when the subject of “men” and neo feminism are brought up.

NUMBER 2: We live in crappy times

May this thing go away this year by GOD’s grace.

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Anyways, not wanting to spend money stopped me from going out places. So I spend all of my time working and also working on personal projects for more income.

I clicked with churchy women and muslim women from Asia.

That’s why it’s hard for me to date right now. that’s probably true for some others. Maybe, maybe not.

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Just comment.

The zodiac signs.

I either grew out of or was never really down with the tye of women I grew up around. These women are still around but it’s much more of the basic type around. That kinda lowers my interest.

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I am aware I can make time. I am aware I can still do what I am currently doing while dating, but the effort on my part is more than I can bear for a moment.

Covid did something weird to my chest. I get annoying fatigue, random episodes of palpitations, and I also can’t be as physical as I once was back in 2021. I can no longer watch porn because my heart will palpitate, I can no longer have sex because of palpitations, shortness of breath, and fatigue. My long covid keeps improving and retracting. The better it gets, the worse the blowback.

This messes with dating BIG TIME.

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This isn’t that big a deal but it got on my nerves in real life a few times. This whole social media stuff changed the way a lot of females 18–35 think. It creates unnecessary dialogue and also it leaves an impression on the youth. Like, I was talking to a woman about something and she lifted her finger and “corrected me” by saying something super woke. I think i was giving and example and she said, “Him or HER” or some gender identity thing like that. I faced that a few times. Like I said, it isn’t big but it’s a factor.

Weave and leggings.

I’m not into all that. I find myself more attracted to rustic or foreign women. I live in the tristate, so all I have are essentially urban women around. In college, I clicked more with women from Nigeria, Korea, the Phillipines, Alaska, and the countryside a lot.

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Thrill seeking adventures like sky diving.

Etc.

Women are getting the wrong impression of men from other women on social media. It’s creating a wall so if a guy who’s less on the confident side ever thinks about shooting his shot, he might not take it. I had a coworker who was cool, a very cool guy, but he was gay. One day, he told me that a coworker didn’t like him and he really asked me about women, like legit, he wanted to understand them. That showed me that bro probably just identified as gay because he just didn’t get these new age women at all. He might’ve been bi if he did, or maybe even straight. Point is all this Tiktok and Disney anti-men BS is having a very real impact on these young women.

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Rent used to be around $1900 and $2400 where I live. Now the average is around $3100 - $4000. These landlords don’t want to work in this post covid society so they jack up the rent to basically make tenants pay their morgage and add a little extra shopping money on the side. I’m better off with a house so I’m saving for one.

I can only speak for myself and no one else.

NUMBER 4: I’m just not that interested in basic American women anymore

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Buddha and Yoga.

So in conclusion

Staying out late.

My life is work and I’m broke